Saturday, August 14, 2010

Seven Things I Miss

I think it's partly because my brother just left. Or maybe because I'm sick & don't have the energy to leave the house. Or maybe it's as simple as this: we have two months of this deployment behind us, but there are still 10 months staring me in the face.  Yes, that might be why my eyes are stinging from crying so much.  I've hit a wall here.  It's not new anymore.  I've settled in, I've come to grips with the fact that my husband is far away at war.  Now, I have to wait.  And it's making me do a lot of missing...&, yuck, crying.  Or, in last night's case, both + some sips of peach schnapps {don't judge me!} + two bubble baths...
  1. I miss my husband.  When you're used to living along, missing the one you love is hard enough.  But when you're used to living with that loved one & then they leave, well...it leaves a huge emptiness that nothing can fill.  I'm not sure what to do anymore.  So I pray   I miss his arms around me when I cry, his head on the pillow next to mine.  I miss him holding my hand during simple grocery shopping & the way we like to cook dinner together.  But do you know what?  He's missing all of these things too...

  2. I miss my family!  Oh, my lovely wonderful loving family!  I wish that I could jump in my car with L & L & drive home to them all!  We could watch movies together, talk for hours, & best of all: I'd never be alone.

  3. I miss the United States.  When you move to a foreign country, you really begin to think about all the fantastic things that make you an American, that make America fantastic!  And frequently, it's the little things you miss first: the language, the restaurants, the shops.  Then, you miss the patriotism, the ease of travel, the lack of effort it takes to go out & find a job or register for a fun class or take up a new hobby.  God Bless the USA!

  4. I miss my piano.  Er, my parents' piano.  I've been playing since I was 4 & wow, do I miss sitting down to "tickle the ivories", as they say!  I could create for hours.  I suppose it's a sort of stress reliever for me.

  5. I miss my truck.  My Dodge Ram 1500 Quad-Cab Hemi!  Grr, that's right!  Isn't it strange how a car can link you to yourself?  Here in Germany, you don't see many trucks.  Too big.  And too slow!  Can you imagine one of them driving through the itsy bity cobblestone streets?  Or glugging along on the autobahn?

  6. I miss college.  I said it!  Can you believe it?  But it's true; I miss having something to work hard at that I can then be proud of myself for.  There's nothing like getting an A on a test after hours of studying!  Those were good feelings!  And I miss my college friends too, having them all right down the hall.  Oh, that was nice!

  7. I miss home.  Maybe you've seen the quote I placed at the bottom of my blog.  "I cast my lot in with a soldier, & where he was was home to me."  It's true.  Home isn't home without Don here.  It's just a building with four walls, three floors, & rooms.  Without him here, my roots are gone.  I'm ungrounded, you could say.  It will be nice when I'm home again, when my home is home again.

Time for me to find ways to stay busy...in Germany.  Any suggestions?!  Quilting classes on Post, perhaps?  But I need more!  Knitting?  Crocheting?  Heeeeelp!
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